What Does Your First Name Really Mean...?
These interpretations tickled me pink, Karen apparently means,"Huge tits, shags like a rabbit." heheh, go look yours up!
Abby - agony aunt, always willing to explain about your confused sexuallity.
Ada - blue haired, smells of wee.
Adie - quiet and shy, but when you get to know her .. quiet and shy.
Adrianna - eats like a horse yet incredibly scrawny, her girlfriends all hate her.
Aileen - laughs like a demented dog. likes tic tacs.
Alana - pretty and popular, but with very dark secrets.
Alexandra - popular but very loud, sometimes forgets to bathe.
Alice - likes horses but looks like Kermit's girlfriend.
Alicia - pretty and knows it, watches herslf go by in shop windows.
Alison - bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light off.
Alyssa - wants to be 'exotic', but only manages to be 'strange'.
Amanda - I.Q. smaller than her bra size, a good shag, but she does practice a lot.
Amber - stereotypical exotic dancer, not too bright but very flexible.
Amy - Devious, Likes being on top, never stays the night - Not to be trusted. Likes any man not wearing trousers
Amelia - A bit old fashioned, but still a goer.
Anastasia - overly-loud, with delusions of grandeur.
Andrea - Small breasts, small arse, drinks pints and plays a mean game of pool.
Andrina - dark and sultry, pretends she's a Russian spy.
Angel - face like an angel, mouth like the biker-girl from hell.
Angela - Vain, Hair style more important than oxygen. Usually found hanging around toilets.
Anita - Beautiful girl with perfect hair and a body to die for.
Ann - bone idle, can't be arsed to put an 'e' at the end of her name.
Annabelle - Doesn't wear knickers.
Anneka - Sporty type, in and out of the bedroom.
Annette - She's BIG, like really BIG!!.
Anne - Looks like a horse, can't drive.
Anne-Marie - Gorgeous and with a great taste in blokes, has perfectly formed breasts
Annie - Drinks too much, always wakes up next to ugly guys.
Ashlee - Dyslexic and spends all day thinking about secs.
Aurora - Beautiful and sexy, every mans dream ,but sadly swings the other way.
Azaria - Beautiful and exotic with the brain power of an orchid.
Barbara - Shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance. Wears alot of make up
Bea - Beautiful, sexy, original, but nearly impossible to satisfy in bed.
Becky - one of the boys, knows all about football and cars, quite tall.
Belinda - Pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points.
Beryl - Repressed alcoholic.
Beth - Empty headed, big breasted, and easy.
Bettina - Dominatrix.
Beverley - Trapped in an eighties timewarp.
Bianca - Ginger. big mouth.
Birgit - big scarey woman, likes small blokes she can intimidate.
Brenda - Big hearted, in fact big everything-ed.
Bridgette - Eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars.
Britney - Falsely improved, no use to society.
Cait - Bow-legged country girl, really loves her horses.
Callie - Dresses strangely, has psychopathic tendencies.
Camilla - replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'.
Cara - lazy girl, eats too much junk-food and yet doesn't get fat - annoying.
Carie - just like the movie, a scary freak.
Carina - Looks like the back of a bus, doesn't swallow.
Carla - Down to earth with good child-bearing hips.
Carly - Party animal until she gets too drunk to stand up.
Carol - Bubbly, life and soul of the party and the bedroom.
Caroline - Lard arse, shaves her ears, picks her nose and shops at oxfam.
Cassy - Giggles too much, bit of an air-head.
Catherine - Attracted to the older man, needs ironing.
Celine - Emits hideous noises, waste of DNA.
Charlotte - Enjoys tea and cake, farts the national anthem.
Chaz - life and soul of the party, plays the piano and then strips to her own music.
Chelsie - upmarket chav, says; "no right, I say right, etc"
Cheryl - Can fit hand in mouth, eats glass.
Chloe - Usually a weather-girl or a failed wannabe weather-girl.
Christine - Likes men in uniform, never warm.
Christina - Drop dead gorgeous and with a different bloke each night, well practiced.
Ciji - strange girl, sleeps with a vibrating teddy-bear.
Claire / Clare / Clair - Usually neurotic, gives good head but can have lesbian tendencies.
Caoilionn - looks good and talks dirty.
Corinne - Insanely curious about everybody and everything.
Courtney - Bit of a 'tomboy', rolls her own tampons.
Daisy - Virgin, works on a farm because she likes the way the tractor vibrates.
Danni - Always happy to make up a nice three-some, often brings her sister.
Danielle - Stunningly attractive, yet has a tendency to self-destruct.
Davina - drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck.
Dawn - Gets up early, smells of chips.
Debra - Wannabe porn star
Debby - Experienced porn star.
Deborah - Bites the pillow, uses both hands.
Dee - Enormous mouth, gets a lot of work in porn movies.
DeeDee - cannot understand why no-one else masturbates in Ikea.
Denise - Sits on cats eyes, wears too much make up.
Di - Enjoys receiving oral sex, but doesn't like giving it.
Diana - Cuddly, which is a shame because she smells like cheese.
Diane - Enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle.
Dina - Always cheerful, wants everyone else to be as happy as she is.
Donna - 70's throw back, likes cabbage.
Dorthe - smells of herrings, obsessed with over-sized sex toys.
Edith - dresses down, but mighty hot beneath.
Eileen - terrible flirt and yet shy deep down.
Elaine - Rides side saddle, drinks meths and likes sharp edges.
Eleanor - Very posh, always washing her hands, but likes her sex dirty.
Elizabeth - Born to perform, hates chickens.
Ella - Fiery temper, but when she's not shouting she's as cute as a kitten,
Ellie - Far too attractive for the swear words that come out of her mouth.
Ellen - Could well have eaten all the pies.
Elma - Shy, easily dominated by men.
Elsa - Kind of old fashioned, but with beautiful big hair.
Emily - Wears odd socks, can have lesbian tendencies.
Emma - Gullible and easily swayed by a good looker!
Erminia - Small and graceful, slightly psychotic.
Estelle - Likes wombles, eats grass.
Esther - Plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed.
Eve - Shy timid creature until she has a drink, then she becomes very loud.
Evonne - Much happier now that the sex change operation was a success.
Faith - Legs meet at knees, can't shag standing up.
Fae - Small and pretty, her mind seems always elsewhere.
Faye - Wears wellies, can't swim.
Fee - Not very bright, talks fast to make up for it.
Felicity - One of the boys .. except that she has the most enormous nipples.
Fern - Posh with a large mouth, can hold a conversation whilst giving head.
Fiona - Female mud wrestler, badly needs a shave.
Fiyza - Very sexy, she knows it and she flaunts it
Florence - pretty, but sometimes too nice .. people tend to take advantage of her.
Francesca - Likes horses, not too fond of blokes.
Francess - A lovely lady even if she is as common as muck!
Frankie - Wears leather underwear, if it's quiet you can hear her buzzing.
Gabriel - An arse to die for but pads her bra with tissues.
Gail - Farts a lot, drinks Guinness.
Gayleen - Big tall woman who talks shite all day.
Gaynor - Wanna-be Lesbian who can't pull the girls.
Gemma - Talks too much, even during sex, even during oral sex!
Geraldine - Too posh for her own good, likes flying.
Gillian - Dyes her hair green, likes clubbing.
Gina - Eternal mother, eats nappies.
Glenda - Eats children, hates smoking.
Georgia - Loves her cakes, would rather have gateau than sex.
Georgina - Wants to be a man.
Grace - petite and pretty, fucks like a rabbit.
Grainne - Giggles excessively, sometimes wets herself.
Gwyneth - Blubs a lot, wees in the bath.
Hannah - Needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs.
Harriet - Wears tweed and green wellies to the pub.
Hayley - Pretty, likes fast cars and slow men.
Hazel - has piercings, wears black.
Heather - Shags like a freight train, bit of a screamer.
Helen - Hangs around with the wrong rowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn and is totally neurotic.
Helena - Likes to be in charge, wears a lot of black rubber.
Heidi - The hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins, hates Nazis.
Hilary - Frigid.
Holly - very sexy, doesn't take any crap from anyone.
Imogen - Drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed.
Ingrid - Right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles.
Iona - always carries a plastic carrier bag containing a bottle of strong cider.
Isabel - Pretty lady who likes to be dominated, needs a man, any man.
Isobel - Motorbike gang leader, sells guns for pocket money.
Jackie - Heroin addict, sold her child.
Jade - I once had a Jade, but hasn't everybody??
Jalaine - Strange, introverted girl, secretly into plastic model aeroplanes.
Jamie - Gentle and yet with a very scary temper.
Janet - Massive over bite, no neck.
Jane - She's hot and she knows it, a prick-teaser.
Janice - Loud and over-the-top, tends to talk with her hands.
Janine - Always takes on the 'mother role' when in a group.
Jarla - Kinda like a female Ali-G only not as funny.
Jasmin - Smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats.
Jean - hangs around with old blokes and let's them buy her stuff.
Jemma - Does anal, wears too much eye make-up.
Jen - accident prone, especially around men she fancies.
Jenni - bone idle hence the tendency to shorten long words.
Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.
Jeri - only owns one pair of knickers and they've never been worn.
Jessica - Always shags on the first date and sometimes even before it.
Jo - Bisexual and proud of it.
Joanna - Moans in her sleep, moans when she wakes up, can't cook.
Joelle - Lively, exciting, jolly and fun ... sometimes too much so!
Josephine - Likes to be tied up and teased.
Jodie - pretty and clever, therefor a bitch
Jody - Dresses like a boy and eats live frogs for breakfast.
Jordon - Wears a lot of make-up, nobody knows what she looks like.
Joyce - Never stops talking ... for God's sake shut up woman!
Judith - Big eyes, big tits, big problem with ballance.
Judy - Huge tits, married to a retard.
Julia - Innocent face, don't trust her, she'll steal your wallet in five minutes
Juliet - Eats too many chips, has greasy hair and a hairy arse.
Justine- Massive tits, likes hanging around men's toilets.
Julie - Likes outdoor sex, preferably with a chance of getting caught.
Kacie - cute and adorable, but prone to sulking.
Karen - Huge tits, shags like a rabbit.
Karly - not too bright but always means well, pretty in a tubby way.
Kate - kisses with her tongue and can hold a conversation whilst doing it.
Katherine - old-fashioned girl, giggles when anyone mentions naughty words.
Kathryn - life and soul of any party until she falls asleep an hour before the end.
Katey - Tom boy, likes her sex dirty, usually outdoors.
Katie - likes blokes and team sports, preferably both together.
Kayleigh - The Lara Croft of Essex, great in bed (practice makes perfect)
Keira - person most likely to start a cult, related to Starlin.
Kelly - smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing.
Kelley - not very bright, can't spell Kelly.
Kelsey - Very clever, wears glasses, boys scare her.
Kerran - tries to be mysterious, but everyone has been there.
Kerry - pretty, cute, and changes underwear once a week.
Kiersten - very sexy to look at, hard to please in bed.
Kim - small and sexy, only into pretty boys.
Kimberley - wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a bloke and swears loudly.
Kira - She's very very hot, so it's a shame about the lobotomy.
Kirsty - Eats live moles, can't dance.
Krista - Cool and pretty, tends to daydream all day and sleepwalk all night.
Kristy - Shy until she gets drunk, prone to spots.
Kristen - Emotionally stunted, thinks Robot-Wars is cruel and should be banned.
Kylie - Can't sing but who cares ... lovely arse.
Lana - Hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy.
Lara - Fun loving girl, but doesn't find time for blokes..
Laura - Likes Max power magazine, can't drive. Dominatrix
Lauren - Pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night.
Leah - Likes outdoor sex, wees standing up.
Leanne - Eats a lot of raw meat, most guys are scared of her.
Leaine - Seems cute until she opens her mouth and starts swearing.
Lena - Eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking.
Leonie - Tall girl who likes short boys, it's a power thing.
Leslie - Likes bondage, hates men.
Leyla - Hot and horny, the girl that always will.
Lily - Makes a good friend, doesn't take crap from anyone.
Linda - Teenage bride can swallow oranges whole.
Lindsey - Likes doggy style, doesn't do housework.
Lisa - enjoys money and is only turned on whilst watching porn.
Liz - Long legged and brainy.
Lizbeth - Sensible and serious, can talk without moving her lips.
Lois - Just wants to be loved but everyone seems to want to over-protect her.
Lorraine - Constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of jellybabies
Lorrie - Named after the vehicle she weighs the same as.
Louise/a - Likes to get around, fantastic breasts.
Luci - cute and loveable
Lucy - Strange dancer, wants to marry her dad.
Lyndsey - wears 2 pairs of knickers, won't undress with the lights on.
Lynn - Funny and sexy, everything a bloke wants in a woman.
Lynnette - Has the attention span of a budgerigar, likes pretty things.
Madeline - Drives like a bloke, likes tractors.
Madusa - Really likes men, preferrably grilled with a side salad.
Maggie - Trainspotter, likes plaid.
Mairi - Quiet and shy but incredibly clever, secretly planning to take over the world.
Mandy - Cute and cuddly, thick as a short plank.
Margaret - Lovely mother, very generous.
Maria - Bangs like a barn door.
Marie - Life sapping dominatrix. Likes men to do DIY.
Marina - No get up and go, rusty underwear.
Marion - stuffs her bra with tissue, a bit cross-eyed.
Marolyn - Eats like a horse, out stays her welcome.
Martha - enjoys cooking, a shame it's always inedible.
Martina - Ugly lesbian.
Martine - Can't act, can't sing, nice tits.
Mary - Likes men with long tongues and talented fingers.
Matilda - Likes dancing, mainly the waltz.
Mavis - seems nice until you notice the black cat, broomstick and pointed hat.
Meg - Cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S.
Meghan - Cold, hard-hearted bitch, enjoys upsetting little children.
Melanie - Can hold 2 bar vacuum orally indefinitely.
Melinda - Trailer trash ... pretty, plump, and infected.
Melissa - Eats dogs, has been in prison 6 times for burglary.
Mercedes - pretends to be posh yet enjoys sleeping around.
Meryl - Dances like an ape, doesn't realise.
Mia - Cute, small, sexy, but mostly just annoying.
Michaela - Likes animals, should make a video with them.
Michelle - Wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag.
Mikayla - Petite and shy, doesn't realise how pretty she is.
Marsha - Big butt, small brain.
Molly - Pretty and naive, would like to be slimmer, wears clothes with too many flowers.
Monica - Control freak, but very pretty so we'll let her off.
Monique - cool, calm, collected and probably drunk.
Morven - Very very loud and doesn't see to realise it.
Nadine - Stunt Lady, can drink any bloke under the table! Don't mess with her.
Naomi - Wannabe diva, more of a diver.
Nancy - White hair, pays for her real ale in old money.
Narelle - Likes dressing up as a French maid but not French.
Natalie - Eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune.
Natasha - Had seven kids before age 17, needs ironing.
Nell - Hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent.
Nephie - Pretty, smiles a lot, not very bright.
Niamh - Quiet and cute, secretly wears mens under-wear.
Nicci - Pretty, blonde, nicely dressed and vacant.
Nichola - quiet, studious type, wears glasses, a tiger in bed.
Nicola - Slapper, alcoholic in denial.
Nicole - small sweet and with nice hair, should wear underwear more often.
Niki - wannabe mysterious spy but not bright enough.
Nikki - wannabe lap-dancer but got no rythm.
Nina - Stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years.
Nissa - speach impediment causes her to hiss, fond of reptiles.
Olga - You can park a bike in her arse crack, excessive facial hair.
Olive - usually accompanied by a couple of people in white coats.
Olivia - Gorgeous and knows it, has to sew herself into her trousers..
Olwyn - stupid name, welsh, just unlucky I guess.
Paige - Normally much too serious, but giggles a lot in bed.
Pamela - Gives amazing head, made of plastic.
Patricia - Obsessive about appearances, yet denies that she's shallow.
Pat - short and common, one of the lads and a bit of a laff.
Paula - Transvestite merchant banker from Basildon.
Peggy - Wears outdated clothes and will only do missionary position.
Penelope - Pitstop queen, likes her men to be stiff.
Peta - Rough and tough, seriously into bondage.
Phillippa - Forest forager, likes wild boar.
Phyliss - Thinks sex is dirty, always washing her hands.
Polly - nice girl with really bad dress-sense, fashion disaster, it's a shame.
Priscilla - likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly.
Preya - can't cook or clean but good in bed.
Prudence - sensible girl, wears flat shoes, but will shag anything in trousers.
Rachel - Amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks.
Rebecca - Hairy armpits, orgasms without contact.
Rebekah - Not very bright, pretty, but sometimes forgets to bathe.
Robbie - Fun loving tom-boy with a cheeky smile.
Roberta - Takes herself much too seriously, could be a fun loving tom-boy.
Renee - Huge breasts, but wishes blokes would notice her mind.
Rhiannon - big and strong, prone to vilence.
Riza - clever and funny, makes some blokes feel threatened.
Romany - Wild and beautiful, swings both ways.
Rosalind - Upper-class lady but works as a secret agent when the government needs her.
Rose - Can be prickly, gives good head.
Rosemary - Very shy, nearly always seen with a bright red face.
Roz - Only enjoys sex when she's tied up and spanked first.
Rula - She measures up well.
Ruth - Has stretch marks around her mouth.
Sadie - Stand up if you're slim, please stand up.
Sally - Drives a Mustang, fights in pubs.
Samantha - Loves her brother, has 4 deformed children.
Sammy - likes to be the centre of attention, clumsy.
Sandra - Shags donkeys for fun, bow legged.
Sara - Air-head, with a gorgeous body to compensate.
Sarah - Likes pressed flowers and body piercing.
Sarah-Jane - 'posh' girl, will screw anything in a BMW.
Sasha - dresses like a bloke, screws like a rabbit.
Scarlett - stunnngly beautiful and with a temper like a nuclear explosion.
Selina - Doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills.
Shannon - Beautiful, curvaceous, should be a model.
Sharon - The original bitch queen, uses everyone she meets.
Shauna - Lives in a trailer, has 16 kids each with a different surname.
Shelly - very cute, but a bit of a soft-hearted slapper.
Sheree - Cute, but very loud! desperately needs a volume control.
Shirley - Can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas.
Shona - Librarian by day, exotic dancer by night.
Siobhan - Ginger Minger with a severe wind problem.
Sinead - Wears big knickers and a vest, but is secretly very sexual.
Sian - Does great sheep impression, hates mint sauce.
Silka - Appears shy, but secretly Miss Whiplash the dominatrix.
Silke - Only ever has sex outdoors near her favourite tree.
Simone - Used to be a shotputter from Cardiff.
Sonya - Dirty lady of the night. Often referred to as a "carrier".
Sophia - Beautiful girl with long legs, a shame her arse is the size of a small country.
Sophie - Brothel manager because she's too ugly to be a working girl.
Stacey - Likes cut off jeans and arseless Speedo's.
Steffi - Closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect.
Stella - reassuringly expensive, she's worth every penny!
Stephanie - Eats Muppets, wears Brogues.
Sue/Susanne - should shave more often, wears Denim aftershave. Very fertile.
Summer - wears flowers in her hair, a pretty dress, and no knickers.
Sylvia - loves the outdoors. Mad.
Tammy - Kind-hearted and generous, particularly in the bedroom.
Tanya - Hot minx, too short.
Tara - Upper class slapper, enjoys random chemicals.
Teresa - surprisingly small given the amount of alcohol she drinks.
Teri - fun and flirty, sometimes annoyingly bouncy!
Tiffany - likes short skirts and low tops, spends a lot of time in front of a mirror.
Tina - Face like a smacked arse, should eat less.
Tori - Lives in a hedge, can't water ski.
Tracy - Easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves kittens.
Tracey - Wears a lot of pink, wants to be a lesbian cos she thinks that would be cool.
Trudy - Genuinely nice lady, everybody loves her.
Ursula - Likes puppies,usually in a hot curry.
Val - usually drunk, doesn't know where her knickers are.
Valerie - quaint and old-fashioned, someones aunt.
Vanessa - Beautiful, power-crazy bitch.
Vera - favouritr Aunty, smellsfaintly of lavender.
Veronica - closet lesbian who sleeps around to prove she isn't!
Vicky - Likes Yoga. And Women.
Victoria - everybody loves her but not as much as she loves herself.
Vikki - Drinks anything so long as it's got vodka in it.
Wendy - works on a building site, possibly a man.
Yasmin - Talks loud and fast, thinks she's gorgeous.
Yvette - slightly timid, until she loses her temper and then watch out.
Yvonne - control freak and yet crap at everything she does.
Zakia - Wants to be a spy when she grows up, but needs to wash more often.
Zoe - Talentless rock chick. Prepared to use sex as a weapon.
Men's Names
Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff.
Adam - cute, funny, chicks dig him, well hung but very caring.
Adrian - usually short and very horny, watches cartoons.
Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women.
Alex - cute and short but a liar and a cheat.
Amir - Dirty, Smelly, Pecker is minuscule.
Andy - boring and has a small pecker.
Andrew - gay and still has a small pecker.
Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain.
Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of weed.
Arnold - loser.
Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate.
Barry - lights fires, pinches girls bottoms and is well hung.
Ben - funny and can be real difficult to beat at games.
Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands.
Brad - thinks everyone likes him...but they don't.
Brandon - good looking but uses girls.
Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time.
Brett - world wide slut and really insensitive, women love him.
Brian - mean and only thinks of himself, no he's not the Messiah he's just a naughty boy.
Bryan - sexy, but stupid - can't spell.
Bronsen - annoying and never grows up - has a stupid name.
Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce.
Bryce - fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a week.
Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Gemini.
Cameron - Australian
Carl - thinks he's funny...he's not, falls asleep during sex.
Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive.
Chad - cute, sensitive and very studly - only found in American movies no real person has that name.
Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together.
Chris - can't pull, will pay for women, but has a huge pecker and can use it too.
Christian - very sexy and seductive (think 'Legends of the Fall').
Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'.
Cliff - very sweet and adores girls, but very superficial.
Cole - nice, funny, and fun to be around.
Con - lies to women and blows up public buildings.
Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines.
Craig - tries to fit in - he never does.
Cyril - well, Cyril.
Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way.
Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics.
Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid.
Daniel - enjoys root vegetables in every orifice.
Darren - charming , but sleeps with men.
Daryl - smells bad, has no real mates
David - total wanker - hated by all.
Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter - i.e. a wanker.
Dean - full of himself and thinks with his dick.
Dennis - either very nice to girls or a faggot.
Derek - has a great sense of humour, and blow-up doll collection.
Dominic - hilarious and will do anything to please.
Don - dickhead.
Doug - has a greasy face, drinking problem and farts.
Drew - bad-arse losers who never shuts up.
Dylan - horny bastard, who can't sing.
Dwayne - cool guy to be around if you can handle his name.
Eddie - wants too many chicks he'll never get cos he's an arsehole.
Emrys - Load mouth gobby Shitte.
Elliott - Full of himself
Eric - shy.
Erik - funny and treats girls how he wants to be treated.
Evan - a little slow but sweet, sexy, and model mental patient.
Frank - "different" - missing DNA - favours girls named Lucy.
Gareth - sweet but dresses too good to be straight.
Gary - drug addict but willing to share.
Gavin - likes bondage, S&M with other men.
Geoff - prefers golf to sex and war to peace.
George - barman who drinks more than he serves.
Glen - the sweetest guy - really down to earth
Greame - very hard to understand, likes group sex
Graham - will screw anything
Grant - HORNY! but so sweet and you can talk to him about anything.
Greg - really sweet and feels sorry for himself.
Guy - Covers his back, has a small dick.
Harvey - cute, but addicted to sex and/or drugs.
Hathem - smooth, but very manipulative, not to be trusted around young girls.
Haydn - tries hard.
Howard - likes small-breasted women and pornography (doesn't everybody!).
Ian - really popular but knows all the girls want him...yeh right!!!
Jake - shy and sweet but a slut when drunk.
Jamie - Scum of the Earth.
James - built like a horse.
Jay - very sweet when you get to know him well.
Jeff - really ugly.
Jerome - gay, but very unhappy.
Jeremy - loud and thinks that he's all that he says he is.
Jesse - unpopular and needs to move on.
Jack - stupid but hot. Always alright.
Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection.
Joe - built like a bear, sexy but tends to lose his head.
Joel - arse.
John - has no friends or life - tends to kill small animals.
Jonathon - think he's good - he's shit.
Jordan - sexy but weird in bed.
Jose - hot boy with a love of hermaphrodites.
Josh - full of himself, fun.
Junior - hotty and totally good at football.
Justin - aggravating, insecure & jealous.
Kain - the sexiest guy alive but very stuck up.
Kevin - Always attracts really fit girlfriends also has a large penis, really nice to women.
Keith - good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse.
Kenneth - very, very...anything you want him to be.
Kim - very understanding and caring, feels lost in Korea.
Kurt - can kick anyone's arse, likes small boys.
Ky - see Kain.
Kyle - hornball who eats too many cornchips.
Larry - cute but wannabe player with big arse.
Laurey - short and funny looking.
Lee - girl dressed up as a boy, total arse bandit.
Lewis - lonely, sad git, bit of a tosser.
Lyndon - can always be found in bed or in the pub.
Liam - loud mouthed arsehole, normally found in rock bands and pubs.
Lorenzo - fine and dresses in stolen gold.
Lucas - fat loser that dates other men.
Luke - seems to be sweet - Luke Solomons exactly!
Malcolm - tall man who tends to lose his trousers.
Marc - Fantasises about pretty lights, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke - Tries to tell everyone
Mark - wished girls liked him for who he is, not his great looks, mouthy bastard though.
Martin - dresses in stolen gold, loud mouthed arsehole,wees in the bath
Michael - very good looking but he'll do anything for a girl, which is totally sweet.
Mick - always drunk, tendency for drug abuse.
Mitchell - the ugliest dog and he don't get any.
Mohammed - Small Penis
Nathan - stupid as hell, and tends to make others feel dumb.
Nick - HORNY! but really nice - can't get past the missionary position though.
Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed.
Noel - an absolute diamond, sexy, funny and faultless....apart from when it comes to sorting out contents insurance for his home
Oliver - likes men but is in denial.
Oscar - loser, a good name for a dog.
Owen - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs.
Patrick - cool, calm and handsome, a quality only found in pricks.
Paul - drunk, drunk, drunk.
Peter - cutie but very shy, makes women feel like virgins.
Phillip - stupid idiot who wishes he were cool.
Rashpal - C@@t
Reagen - ...strange.
Rhys - great lover but had his mind stolen by aliens a long,long time ago.
Richard - cant see his feet balls are to big
Ricky - ugly shithead who everybody hates.
Rikki - see above.
Rob - constantly watches porn.
Roy - total loser and computer genius.
Rupert - arrogant twat who is crap in bed but thinks he is a stud.
Russell - likes to play in the leaves which makes him an arsehole.
Ryan - short but sexy body and even sexier mind.
Sam - wannabe sex machine.
Scott - has serious disabilities.
Sean - has small testicles and no friends.
Seth - so sweet to other people but is a traitor.
Shane - thinks everybody wants to shag him - he's a virgin.
Shannon - the most determined and persevering sweetie in the world.
Shaun - bit of a hard bastard, thinks women love him.
Simon - likes a night out with the lads and curries. Talks bollocks.
Steve - popular and funny when looked at side-on.
Stuart - droll guy with great arse and suicidal tendencies but great in bed.
Tim - hot but a bit strange, can never tell where he is.
Toby - best blow ever.
Tom - cool but can be arrogant.
Tony - hot, sweet, and totally fun to be around.
Travis - fat and horny with the best XXX collection to be found.
Trevor - sweet and funny but sometimes untrustworthy.
Troy - cute and popular.
Taylor - gay.
Warren - cool, homosexual guy.
Wesley - great guy and easy to tolerate.
Will - wishes he were popular.
Zach - sweet and polite and adorable.
Zahid - devious and sly. Not to be trusted.
Abby - agony aunt, always willing to explain about your confused sexuallity.
Ada - blue haired, smells of wee.
Adie - quiet and shy, but when you get to know her .. quiet and shy.
Adrianna - eats like a horse yet incredibly scrawny, her girlfriends all hate her.
Aileen - laughs like a demented dog. likes tic tacs.
Alana - pretty and popular, but with very dark secrets.
Alexandra - popular but very loud, sometimes forgets to bathe.
Alice - likes horses but looks like Kermit's girlfriend.
Alicia - pretty and knows it, watches herslf go by in shop windows.
Alison - bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light off.
Alyssa - wants to be 'exotic', but only manages to be 'strange'.
Amanda - I.Q. smaller than her bra size, a good shag, but she does practice a lot.
Amber - stereotypical exotic dancer, not too bright but very flexible.
Amy - Devious, Likes being on top, never stays the night - Not to be trusted. Likes any man not wearing trousers
Amelia - A bit old fashioned, but still a goer.
Anastasia - overly-loud, with delusions of grandeur.
Andrea - Small breasts, small arse, drinks pints and plays a mean game of pool.
Andrina - dark and sultry, pretends she's a Russian spy.
Angel - face like an angel, mouth like the biker-girl from hell.
Angela - Vain, Hair style more important than oxygen. Usually found hanging around toilets.
Anita - Beautiful girl with perfect hair and a body to die for.
Ann - bone idle, can't be arsed to put an 'e' at the end of her name.
Annabelle - Doesn't wear knickers.
Anneka - Sporty type, in and out of the bedroom.
Annette - She's BIG, like really BIG!!.
Anne - Looks like a horse, can't drive.
Anne-Marie - Gorgeous and with a great taste in blokes, has perfectly formed breasts
Annie - Drinks too much, always wakes up next to ugly guys.
Ashlee - Dyslexic and spends all day thinking about secs.
Aurora - Beautiful and sexy, every mans dream ,but sadly swings the other way.
Azaria - Beautiful and exotic with the brain power of an orchid.
Barbara - Shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance. Wears alot of make up
Bea - Beautiful, sexy, original, but nearly impossible to satisfy in bed.
Becky - one of the boys, knows all about football and cars, quite tall.
Belinda - Pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points.
Beryl - Repressed alcoholic.
Beth - Empty headed, big breasted, and easy.
Bettina - Dominatrix.
Beverley - Trapped in an eighties timewarp.
Bianca - Ginger. big mouth.
Birgit - big scarey woman, likes small blokes she can intimidate.
Brenda - Big hearted, in fact big everything-ed.
Bridgette - Eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars.
Britney - Falsely improved, no use to society.
Cait - Bow-legged country girl, really loves her horses.
Callie - Dresses strangely, has psychopathic tendencies.
Camilla - replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'.
Cara - lazy girl, eats too much junk-food and yet doesn't get fat - annoying.
Carie - just like the movie, a scary freak.
Carina - Looks like the back of a bus, doesn't swallow.
Carla - Down to earth with good child-bearing hips.
Carly - Party animal until she gets too drunk to stand up.
Carol - Bubbly, life and soul of the party and the bedroom.
Caroline - Lard arse, shaves her ears, picks her nose and shops at oxfam.
Cassy - Giggles too much, bit of an air-head.
Catherine - Attracted to the older man, needs ironing.
Celine - Emits hideous noises, waste of DNA.
Charlotte - Enjoys tea and cake, farts the national anthem.
Chaz - life and soul of the party, plays the piano and then strips to her own music.
Chelsie - upmarket chav, says; "no right, I say right, etc"
Cheryl - Can fit hand in mouth, eats glass.
Chloe - Usually a weather-girl or a failed wannabe weather-girl.
Christine - Likes men in uniform, never warm.
Christina - Drop dead gorgeous and with a different bloke each night, well practiced.
Ciji - strange girl, sleeps with a vibrating teddy-bear.
Claire / Clare / Clair - Usually neurotic, gives good head but can have lesbian tendencies.
Caoilionn - looks good and talks dirty.
Corinne - Insanely curious about everybody and everything.
Courtney - Bit of a 'tomboy', rolls her own tampons.
Daisy - Virgin, works on a farm because she likes the way the tractor vibrates.
Danni - Always happy to make up a nice three-some, often brings her sister.
Danielle - Stunningly attractive, yet has a tendency to self-destruct.
Davina - drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck.
Dawn - Gets up early, smells of chips.
Debra - Wannabe porn star
Debby - Experienced porn star.
Deborah - Bites the pillow, uses both hands.
Dee - Enormous mouth, gets a lot of work in porn movies.
DeeDee - cannot understand why no-one else masturbates in Ikea.
Denise - Sits on cats eyes, wears too much make up.
Di - Enjoys receiving oral sex, but doesn't like giving it.
Diana - Cuddly, which is a shame because she smells like cheese.
Diane - Enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle.
Dina - Always cheerful, wants everyone else to be as happy as she is.
Donna - 70's throw back, likes cabbage.
Dorthe - smells of herrings, obsessed with over-sized sex toys.
Edith - dresses down, but mighty hot beneath.
Eileen - terrible flirt and yet shy deep down.
Elaine - Rides side saddle, drinks meths and likes sharp edges.
Eleanor - Very posh, always washing her hands, but likes her sex dirty.
Elizabeth - Born to perform, hates chickens.
Ella - Fiery temper, but when she's not shouting she's as cute as a kitten,
Ellie - Far too attractive for the swear words that come out of her mouth.
Ellen - Could well have eaten all the pies.
Elma - Shy, easily dominated by men.
Elsa - Kind of old fashioned, but with beautiful big hair.
Emily - Wears odd socks, can have lesbian tendencies.
Emma - Gullible and easily swayed by a good looker!
Erminia - Small and graceful, slightly psychotic.
Estelle - Likes wombles, eats grass.
Esther - Plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed.
Eve - Shy timid creature until she has a drink, then she becomes very loud.
Evonne - Much happier now that the sex change operation was a success.
Faith - Legs meet at knees, can't shag standing up.
Fae - Small and pretty, her mind seems always elsewhere.
Faye - Wears wellies, can't swim.
Fee - Not very bright, talks fast to make up for it.
Felicity - One of the boys .. except that she has the most enormous nipples.
Fern - Posh with a large mouth, can hold a conversation whilst giving head.
Fiona - Female mud wrestler, badly needs a shave.
Fiyza - Very sexy, she knows it and she flaunts it
Florence - pretty, but sometimes too nice .. people tend to take advantage of her.
Francesca - Likes horses, not too fond of blokes.
Francess - A lovely lady even if she is as common as muck!
Frankie - Wears leather underwear, if it's quiet you can hear her buzzing.
Gabriel - An arse to die for but pads her bra with tissues.
Gail - Farts a lot, drinks Guinness.
Gayleen - Big tall woman who talks shite all day.
Gaynor - Wanna-be Lesbian who can't pull the girls.
Gemma - Talks too much, even during sex, even during oral sex!
Geraldine - Too posh for her own good, likes flying.
Gillian - Dyes her hair green, likes clubbing.
Gina - Eternal mother, eats nappies.
Glenda - Eats children, hates smoking.
Georgia - Loves her cakes, would rather have gateau than sex.
Georgina - Wants to be a man.
Grace - petite and pretty, fucks like a rabbit.
Grainne - Giggles excessively, sometimes wets herself.
Gwyneth - Blubs a lot, wees in the bath.
Hannah - Needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs.
Harriet - Wears tweed and green wellies to the pub.
Hayley - Pretty, likes fast cars and slow men.
Hazel - has piercings, wears black.
Heather - Shags like a freight train, bit of a screamer.
Helen - Hangs around with the wrong rowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn and is totally neurotic.
Helena - Likes to be in charge, wears a lot of black rubber.
Heidi - The hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins, hates Nazis.
Hilary - Frigid.
Holly - very sexy, doesn't take any crap from anyone.
Imogen - Drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed.
Ingrid - Right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles.
Iona - always carries a plastic carrier bag containing a bottle of strong cider.
Isabel - Pretty lady who likes to be dominated, needs a man, any man.
Isobel - Motorbike gang leader, sells guns for pocket money.
Jackie - Heroin addict, sold her child.
Jade - I once had a Jade, but hasn't everybody??
Jalaine - Strange, introverted girl, secretly into plastic model aeroplanes.
Jamie - Gentle and yet with a very scary temper.
Janet - Massive over bite, no neck.
Jane - She's hot and she knows it, a prick-teaser.
Janice - Loud and over-the-top, tends to talk with her hands.
Janine - Always takes on the 'mother role' when in a group.
Jarla - Kinda like a female Ali-G only not as funny.
Jasmin - Smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats.
Jean - hangs around with old blokes and let's them buy her stuff.
Jemma - Does anal, wears too much eye make-up.
Jen - accident prone, especially around men she fancies.
Jenni - bone idle hence the tendency to shorten long words.
Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.
Jeri - only owns one pair of knickers and they've never been worn.
Jessica - Always shags on the first date and sometimes even before it.
Jo - Bisexual and proud of it.
Joanna - Moans in her sleep, moans when she wakes up, can't cook.
Joelle - Lively, exciting, jolly and fun ... sometimes too much so!
Josephine - Likes to be tied up and teased.
Jodie - pretty and clever, therefor a bitch
Jody - Dresses like a boy and eats live frogs for breakfast.
Jordon - Wears a lot of make-up, nobody knows what she looks like.
Joyce - Never stops talking ... for God's sake shut up woman!
Judith - Big eyes, big tits, big problem with ballance.
Judy - Huge tits, married to a retard.
Julia - Innocent face, don't trust her, she'll steal your wallet in five minutes
Juliet - Eats too many chips, has greasy hair and a hairy arse.
Justine- Massive tits, likes hanging around men's toilets.
Julie - Likes outdoor sex, preferably with a chance of getting caught.
Kacie - cute and adorable, but prone to sulking.
Karen - Huge tits, shags like a rabbit.
Karly - not too bright but always means well, pretty in a tubby way.
Kate - kisses with her tongue and can hold a conversation whilst doing it.
Katherine - old-fashioned girl, giggles when anyone mentions naughty words.
Kathryn - life and soul of any party until she falls asleep an hour before the end.
Katey - Tom boy, likes her sex dirty, usually outdoors.
Katie - likes blokes and team sports, preferably both together.
Kayleigh - The Lara Croft of Essex, great in bed (practice makes perfect)
Keira - person most likely to start a cult, related to Starlin.
Kelly - smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing.
Kelley - not very bright, can't spell Kelly.
Kelsey - Very clever, wears glasses, boys scare her.
Kerran - tries to be mysterious, but everyone has been there.
Kerry - pretty, cute, and changes underwear once a week.
Kiersten - very sexy to look at, hard to please in bed.
Kim - small and sexy, only into pretty boys.
Kimberley - wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a bloke and swears loudly.
Kira - She's very very hot, so it's a shame about the lobotomy.
Kirsty - Eats live moles, can't dance.
Krista - Cool and pretty, tends to daydream all day and sleepwalk all night.
Kristy - Shy until she gets drunk, prone to spots.
Kristen - Emotionally stunted, thinks Robot-Wars is cruel and should be banned.
Kylie - Can't sing but who cares ... lovely arse.
Lana - Hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy.
Lara - Fun loving girl, but doesn't find time for blokes..
Laura - Likes Max power magazine, can't drive. Dominatrix
Lauren - Pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night.
Leah - Likes outdoor sex, wees standing up.
Leanne - Eats a lot of raw meat, most guys are scared of her.
Leaine - Seems cute until she opens her mouth and starts swearing.
Lena - Eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking.
Leonie - Tall girl who likes short boys, it's a power thing.
Leslie - Likes bondage, hates men.
Leyla - Hot and horny, the girl that always will.
Lily - Makes a good friend, doesn't take crap from anyone.
Linda - Teenage bride can swallow oranges whole.
Lindsey - Likes doggy style, doesn't do housework.
Lisa - enjoys money and is only turned on whilst watching porn.
Liz - Long legged and brainy.
Lizbeth - Sensible and serious, can talk without moving her lips.
Lois - Just wants to be loved but everyone seems to want to over-protect her.
Lorraine - Constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of jellybabies
Lorrie - Named after the vehicle she weighs the same as.
Louise/a - Likes to get around, fantastic breasts.
Luci - cute and loveable
Lucy - Strange dancer, wants to marry her dad.
Lyndsey - wears 2 pairs of knickers, won't undress with the lights on.
Lynn - Funny and sexy, everything a bloke wants in a woman.
Lynnette - Has the attention span of a budgerigar, likes pretty things.
Madeline - Drives like a bloke, likes tractors.
Madusa - Really likes men, preferrably grilled with a side salad.
Maggie - Trainspotter, likes plaid.
Mairi - Quiet and shy but incredibly clever, secretly planning to take over the world.
Mandy - Cute and cuddly, thick as a short plank.
Margaret - Lovely mother, very generous.
Maria - Bangs like a barn door.
Marie - Life sapping dominatrix. Likes men to do DIY.
Marina - No get up and go, rusty underwear.
Marion - stuffs her bra with tissue, a bit cross-eyed.
Marolyn - Eats like a horse, out stays her welcome.
Martha - enjoys cooking, a shame it's always inedible.
Martina - Ugly lesbian.
Martine - Can't act, can't sing, nice tits.
Mary - Likes men with long tongues and talented fingers.
Matilda - Likes dancing, mainly the waltz.
Mavis - seems nice until you notice the black cat, broomstick and pointed hat.
Meg - Cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S.
Meghan - Cold, hard-hearted bitch, enjoys upsetting little children.
Melanie - Can hold 2 bar vacuum orally indefinitely.
Melinda - Trailer trash ... pretty, plump, and infected.
Melissa - Eats dogs, has been in prison 6 times for burglary.
Mercedes - pretends to be posh yet enjoys sleeping around.
Meryl - Dances like an ape, doesn't realise.
Mia - Cute, small, sexy, but mostly just annoying.
Michaela - Likes animals, should make a video with them.
Michelle - Wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag.
Mikayla - Petite and shy, doesn't realise how pretty she is.
Marsha - Big butt, small brain.
Molly - Pretty and naive, would like to be slimmer, wears clothes with too many flowers.
Monica - Control freak, but very pretty so we'll let her off.
Monique - cool, calm, collected and probably drunk.
Morven - Very very loud and doesn't see to realise it.
Nadine - Stunt Lady, can drink any bloke under the table! Don't mess with her.
Naomi - Wannabe diva, more of a diver.
Nancy - White hair, pays for her real ale in old money.
Narelle - Likes dressing up as a French maid but not French.
Natalie - Eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune.
Natasha - Had seven kids before age 17, needs ironing.
Nell - Hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent.
Nephie - Pretty, smiles a lot, not very bright.
Niamh - Quiet and cute, secretly wears mens under-wear.
Nicci - Pretty, blonde, nicely dressed and vacant.
Nichola - quiet, studious type, wears glasses, a tiger in bed.
Nicola - Slapper, alcoholic in denial.
Nicole - small sweet and with nice hair, should wear underwear more often.
Niki - wannabe mysterious spy but not bright enough.
Nikki - wannabe lap-dancer but got no rythm.
Nina - Stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years.
Nissa - speach impediment causes her to hiss, fond of reptiles.
Olga - You can park a bike in her arse crack, excessive facial hair.
Olive - usually accompanied by a couple of people in white coats.
Olivia - Gorgeous and knows it, has to sew herself into her trousers..
Olwyn - stupid name, welsh, just unlucky I guess.
Paige - Normally much too serious, but giggles a lot in bed.
Pamela - Gives amazing head, made of plastic.
Patricia - Obsessive about appearances, yet denies that she's shallow.
Pat - short and common, one of the lads and a bit of a laff.
Paula - Transvestite merchant banker from Basildon.
Peggy - Wears outdated clothes and will only do missionary position.
Penelope - Pitstop queen, likes her men to be stiff.
Peta - Rough and tough, seriously into bondage.
Phillippa - Forest forager, likes wild boar.
Phyliss - Thinks sex is dirty, always washing her hands.
Polly - nice girl with really bad dress-sense, fashion disaster, it's a shame.
Priscilla - likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly.
Preya - can't cook or clean but good in bed.
Prudence - sensible girl, wears flat shoes, but will shag anything in trousers.
Rachel - Amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arsecheeks.
Rebecca - Hairy armpits, orgasms without contact.
Rebekah - Not very bright, pretty, but sometimes forgets to bathe.
Robbie - Fun loving tom-boy with a cheeky smile.
Roberta - Takes herself much too seriously, could be a fun loving tom-boy.
Renee - Huge breasts, but wishes blokes would notice her mind.
Rhiannon - big and strong, prone to vilence.
Riza - clever and funny, makes some blokes feel threatened.
Romany - Wild and beautiful, swings both ways.
Rosalind - Upper-class lady but works as a secret agent when the government needs her.
Rose - Can be prickly, gives good head.
Rosemary - Very shy, nearly always seen with a bright red face.
Roz - Only enjoys sex when she's tied up and spanked first.
Rula - She measures up well.
Ruth - Has stretch marks around her mouth.
Sadie - Stand up if you're slim, please stand up.
Sally - Drives a Mustang, fights in pubs.
Samantha - Loves her brother, has 4 deformed children.
Sammy - likes to be the centre of attention, clumsy.
Sandra - Shags donkeys for fun, bow legged.
Sara - Air-head, with a gorgeous body to compensate.
Sarah - Likes pressed flowers and body piercing.
Sarah-Jane - 'posh' girl, will screw anything in a BMW.
Sasha - dresses like a bloke, screws like a rabbit.
Scarlett - stunnngly beautiful and with a temper like a nuclear explosion.
Selina - Doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills.
Shannon - Beautiful, curvaceous, should be a model.
Sharon - The original bitch queen, uses everyone she meets.
Shauna - Lives in a trailer, has 16 kids each with a different surname.
Shelly - very cute, but a bit of a soft-hearted slapper.
Sheree - Cute, but very loud! desperately needs a volume control.
Shirley - Can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas.
Shona - Librarian by day, exotic dancer by night.
Siobhan - Ginger Minger with a severe wind problem.
Sinead - Wears big knickers and a vest, but is secretly very sexual.
Sian - Does great sheep impression, hates mint sauce.
Silka - Appears shy, but secretly Miss Whiplash the dominatrix.
Silke - Only ever has sex outdoors near her favourite tree.
Simone - Used to be a shotputter from Cardiff.
Sonya - Dirty lady of the night. Often referred to as a "carrier".
Sophia - Beautiful girl with long legs, a shame her arse is the size of a small country.
Sophie - Brothel manager because she's too ugly to be a working girl.
Stacey - Likes cut off jeans and arseless Speedo's.
Steffi - Closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect.
Stella - reassuringly expensive, she's worth every penny!
Stephanie - Eats Muppets, wears Brogues.
Sue/Susanne - should shave more often, wears Denim aftershave. Very fertile.
Summer - wears flowers in her hair, a pretty dress, and no knickers.
Sylvia - loves the outdoors. Mad.
Tammy - Kind-hearted and generous, particularly in the bedroom.
Tanya - Hot minx, too short.
Tara - Upper class slapper, enjoys random chemicals.
Teresa - surprisingly small given the amount of alcohol she drinks.
Teri - fun and flirty, sometimes annoyingly bouncy!
Tiffany - likes short skirts and low tops, spends a lot of time in front of a mirror.
Tina - Face like a smacked arse, should eat less.
Tori - Lives in a hedge, can't water ski.
Tracy - Easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves kittens.
Tracey - Wears a lot of pink, wants to be a lesbian cos she thinks that would be cool.
Trudy - Genuinely nice lady, everybody loves her.
Ursula - Likes puppies,usually in a hot curry.
Val - usually drunk, doesn't know where her knickers are.
Valerie - quaint and old-fashioned, someones aunt.
Vanessa - Beautiful, power-crazy bitch.
Vera - favouritr Aunty, smellsfaintly of lavender.
Veronica - closet lesbian who sleeps around to prove she isn't!
Vicky - Likes Yoga. And Women.
Victoria - everybody loves her but not as much as she loves herself.
Vikki - Drinks anything so long as it's got vodka in it.
Wendy - works on a building site, possibly a man.
Yasmin - Talks loud and fast, thinks she's gorgeous.
Yvette - slightly timid, until she loses her temper and then watch out.
Yvonne - control freak and yet crap at everything she does.
Zakia - Wants to be a spy when she grows up, but needs to wash more often.
Zoe - Talentless rock chick. Prepared to use sex as a weapon.
Men's Names
Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff.
Adam - cute, funny, chicks dig him, well hung but very caring.
Adrian - usually short and very horny, watches cartoons.
Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women.
Alex - cute and short but a liar and a cheat.
Amir - Dirty, Smelly, Pecker is minuscule.
Andy - boring and has a small pecker.
Andrew - gay and still has a small pecker.
Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain.
Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of weed.
Arnold - loser.
Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate.
Barry - lights fires, pinches girls bottoms and is well hung.
Ben - funny and can be real difficult to beat at games.
Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands.
Brad - thinks everyone likes him...but they don't.
Brandon - good looking but uses girls.
Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time.
Brett - world wide slut and really insensitive, women love him.
Brian - mean and only thinks of himself, no he's not the Messiah he's just a naughty boy.
Bryan - sexy, but stupid - can't spell.
Bronsen - annoying and never grows up - has a stupid name.
Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce.
Bryce - fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a week.
Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Gemini.
Cameron - Australian
Carl - thinks he's funny...he's not, falls asleep during sex.
Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive.
Chad - cute, sensitive and very studly - only found in American movies no real person has that name.
Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together.
Chris - can't pull, will pay for women, but has a huge pecker and can use it too.
Christian - very sexy and seductive (think 'Legends of the Fall').
Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'.
Cliff - very sweet and adores girls, but very superficial.
Cole - nice, funny, and fun to be around.
Con - lies to women and blows up public buildings.
Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines.
Craig - tries to fit in - he never does.
Cyril - well, Cyril.
Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way.
Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics.
Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid.
Daniel - enjoys root vegetables in every orifice.
Darren - charming , but sleeps with men.
Daryl - smells bad, has no real mates
David - total wanker - hated by all.
Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter - i.e. a wanker.
Dean - full of himself and thinks with his dick.
Dennis - either very nice to girls or a faggot.
Derek - has a great sense of humour, and blow-up doll collection.
Dominic - hilarious and will do anything to please.
Don - dickhead.
Doug - has a greasy face, drinking problem and farts.
Drew - bad-arse losers who never shuts up.
Dylan - horny bastard, who can't sing.
Dwayne - cool guy to be around if you can handle his name.
Eddie - wants too many chicks he'll never get cos he's an arsehole.
Emrys - Load mouth gobby Shitte.
Elliott - Full of himself
Eric - shy.
Erik - funny and treats girls how he wants to be treated.
Evan - a little slow but sweet, sexy, and model mental patient.
Frank - "different" - missing DNA - favours girls named Lucy.
Gareth - sweet but dresses too good to be straight.
Gary - drug addict but willing to share.
Gavin - likes bondage, S&M with other men.
Geoff - prefers golf to sex and war to peace.
George - barman who drinks more than he serves.
Glen - the sweetest guy - really down to earth
Greame - very hard to understand, likes group sex
Graham - will screw anything
Grant - HORNY! but so sweet and you can talk to him about anything.
Greg - really sweet and feels sorry for himself.
Guy - Covers his back, has a small dick.
Harvey - cute, but addicted to sex and/or drugs.
Hathem - smooth, but very manipulative, not to be trusted around young girls.
Haydn - tries hard.
Howard - likes small-breasted women and pornography (doesn't everybody!).
Ian - really popular but knows all the girls want him...yeh right!!!
Jake - shy and sweet but a slut when drunk.
Jamie - Scum of the Earth.
James - built like a horse.
Jay - very sweet when you get to know him well.
Jeff - really ugly.
Jerome - gay, but very unhappy.
Jeremy - loud and thinks that he's all that he says he is.
Jesse - unpopular and needs to move on.
Jack - stupid but hot. Always alright.
Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection.
Joe - built like a bear, sexy but tends to lose his head.
Joel - arse.
John - has no friends or life - tends to kill small animals.
Jonathon - think he's good - he's shit.
Jordan - sexy but weird in bed.
Jose - hot boy with a love of hermaphrodites.
Josh - full of himself, fun.
Junior - hotty and totally good at football.
Justin - aggravating, insecure & jealous.
Kain - the sexiest guy alive but very stuck up.
Kevin - Always attracts really fit girlfriends also has a large penis, really nice to women.
Keith - good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse.
Kenneth - very, very...anything you want him to be.
Kim - very understanding and caring, feels lost in Korea.
Kurt - can kick anyone's arse, likes small boys.
Ky - see Kain.
Kyle - hornball who eats too many cornchips.
Larry - cute but wannabe player with big arse.
Laurey - short and funny looking.
Lee - girl dressed up as a boy, total arse bandit.
Lewis - lonely, sad git, bit of a tosser.
Lyndon - can always be found in bed or in the pub.
Liam - loud mouthed arsehole, normally found in rock bands and pubs.
Lorenzo - fine and dresses in stolen gold.
Lucas - fat loser that dates other men.
Luke - seems to be sweet - Luke Solomons exactly!
Malcolm - tall man who tends to lose his trousers.
Marc - Fantasises about pretty lights, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke - Tries to tell everyone
Mark - wished girls liked him for who he is, not his great looks, mouthy bastard though.
Martin - dresses in stolen gold, loud mouthed arsehole,wees in the bath
Michael - very good looking but he'll do anything for a girl, which is totally sweet.
Mick - always drunk, tendency for drug abuse.
Mitchell - the ugliest dog and he don't get any.
Mohammed - Small Penis
Nathan - stupid as hell, and tends to make others feel dumb.
Nick - HORNY! but really nice - can't get past the missionary position though.
Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed.
Noel - an absolute diamond, sexy, funny and faultless....apart from when it comes to sorting out contents insurance for his home
Oliver - likes men but is in denial.
Oscar - loser, a good name for a dog.
Owen - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs.
Patrick - cool, calm and handsome, a quality only found in pricks.
Paul - drunk, drunk, drunk.
Peter - cutie but very shy, makes women feel like virgins.
Phillip - stupid idiot who wishes he were cool.
Rashpal - C@@t
Reagen - ...strange.
Rhys - great lover but had his mind stolen by aliens a long,long time ago.
Richard - cant see his feet balls are to big
Ricky - ugly shithead who everybody hates.
Rikki - see above.
Rob - constantly watches porn.
Roy - total loser and computer genius.
Rupert - arrogant twat who is crap in bed but thinks he is a stud.
Russell - likes to play in the leaves which makes him an arsehole.
Ryan - short but sexy body and even sexier mind.
Sam - wannabe sex machine.
Scott - has serious disabilities.
Sean - has small testicles and no friends.
Seth - so sweet to other people but is a traitor.
Shane - thinks everybody wants to shag him - he's a virgin.
Shannon - the most determined and persevering sweetie in the world.
Shaun - bit of a hard bastard, thinks women love him.
Simon - likes a night out with the lads and curries. Talks bollocks.
Steve - popular and funny when looked at side-on.
Stuart - droll guy with great arse and suicidal tendencies but great in bed.
Tim - hot but a bit strange, can never tell where he is.
Toby - best blow ever.
Tom - cool but can be arrogant.
Tony - hot, sweet, and totally fun to be around.
Travis - fat and horny with the best XXX collection to be found.
Trevor - sweet and funny but sometimes untrustworthy.
Troy - cute and popular.
Taylor - gay.
Warren - cool, homosexual guy.
Wesley - great guy and easy to tolerate.
Will - wishes he were popular.
Zach - sweet and polite and adorable.
Zahid - devious and sly. Not to be trusted.
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